RNC GREENWICH – HMS EXCELLENT

[Long Gunnery Course]

1874: Long Gunnery Course - Meta's wedding - Meta leaves for Malta 1875: Illness of mother - Visits to London - Death of mother - Birth of George Grogan - Move of family to London - Trouble with Russell and Robbie - Robbie to the Cape. 1876: Views on Admiralty - Levee at St Jame's Palace - Visit to Fleet Street.

1874

AT DEVONPORT - ON LEAVE

24 September – Thursday

24Received my official appointment to the College to join on Monday. Took a long walk with my Father who continued his interesting account of his career as a Mid’n and Mate.

25 September – Friday

My dear Mother’s birthday – who is getting strong very rapidly, I’m glad to say. Father gave her a lovely locket. My credit at the Bank being so much minus prevented me from giving one and I had to content myself with giving Meta a £10 [?] instead of a £30 [?] as I had intended.

The Sapphire was launched yesterday by Lady Keppel. Russ, Rob and I supported Father. I did not feel much interest in it from the fact that my Mother was to have launched her. Made Tryon’s acquaintance.

28 September – Monday

Admiral George Elliot lunched with us. At 2.15 I started for London and got to Greenwich at 12 pm and found no bed ready and two other fellows in the same pickle. However, on finding the messman’s locality I got hold of the bell and after pealing at it about twenty minutes, Mr Collins made his appearance in a dressing gown with a tremendous fat head on. I did not give him time to say a word but told him three of us wanted bedding and shoved my servant into his arms and bolted before he could say anything. To my surprise, the bedding came after some time.

AT GREENWICH

30 September – Wednesday

Been under examination all yesterday and this forenoon for classifying. Ran up to town this afternoon and had an interview with that rascal Forbes and gave him until Thursday morning to send me a cheque before I took measures.

4 October – Sunday

Paid visits yesterday, calling on Admiral Houston Stewart and Mrs Heath. Lunched with Admiral Key the day before. This forenoon attended church in the Chapel, and some 700 Greenwich school boys were marched in. The singing was of course congregational and rather loud, but in very good tune. They were marched off afterwards in fours, and I never saw before such a number of clean looking healthy lads together ranging from 6 to 14. Went to Mr Fleming’s in the evening and heard a very good sermon.

7 October – Wednesday

Have steadied down to a regular grind, going for my hour’s walk at 5. I had a very severe bilious attack this morning and went five times to W C being sick likewise each time from 3 am until 8 am. Remained in bed and lying down until 4 pm. Saw the Doctor, a shore-going fellow and he was very civil. Gave me a lot of physic etc. Heard from my Father that the marriage is put off until the 15th – Why?, I don’t know.

9 October – Friday

Felt precious sorry I ever went in for this gunnery, it makes one such a perfect slave. I’ve no time to read, or do anything else, or study French. My great ambition and wish being to speak that language. Professor Lambert, who instructs us is a very clever and well explaining instructor, but unfortunately, the whole 17 of us are together and between No 1 and No 17 there is a vast difference and Lambert won’t wait for us rusty ones, which is rather a shame. It is in fact the old thing. Teaching how to run before being able to walk. Had a chat with Admiral Key.

12 October – Monday

On Saturday I called on the B’s and Mrs B – and went to Cavendish Club, where I got taken sick again with dysentery. I just managed in the intervals to fetch down to College.

Yesterday I ran up to town and went to hear Fleming. He preached a splendid sermon, a sort of person that makes the quarter of hours turn into minutes.

This morning heard from dear Meta who told me of her marriage being put off until the 20th on account of some delay in the marriage settlements. It will suit me much better, so I’m not sorry.

Hard at work all today, I don’t get time to read a book or write letters and it is a tremendous grind. Lambert shoves one on ahead so fast, there is no time to get up back work. One’s time is fully employed in keeping up.

Heard from Editor of Navy List – and Henry B.

14 October – Wednesday

Ran over to the Millwall docks after study and went over the Kaiser, a fine iron-clad frigate building for the Germans. She is to be completed in a few months, and is to carry 8 – 22 ton Krupp guns in a central battery and one stern chaser – no bow gun. Her two foremost and two after guns firing within a small angle of the keel. Her stern gun has hardly any training.

She has 10 in. and 8 in. armour on and is expected to realise 14 knots, is ship rigged moderately big span. Over her engine room are strong iron gratings moveable by screws. She is to cost about a million and is very well fitted up inside, with maple wood jalousies, rosewood and mahogany fittings about the cabins.

There are two of them exactly similar, the other one the Deutschland is not quite so far advanced.

There is no doubt the Germans are getting together very quickly a good sized fleet, having an advantage over ours in being all something alike in shape, size and speed. But I don’t think we need fear them. Firstly, because the English Navy has never been beaten, except in a few isolated cases, and secondly Germany will have enough to do during the next century in keeping clear of Russia and France, if she can manage to do so, which I think is rather doubtful.

I had a look at the Independencia, a two turret vessel. but its getting dark prevented my seeing anything of her inside. I was very much surprised at the size of the basins and number of ships and steamers in them. One cannot form an idea of their number, just seeing their masts from the river, so many being hidden by others etc.

AT DEVONPORT - ON LEAVE

22 October – Thursday

Since last writing anything down in my journal some little time has elapsed.

Well Friday last the 16th, I left Waterloo by the 4.5 train getting a third-class ticket and travelling 2nd class, as no through thirds run. Got down to Exeter half an hour late, but fortunately for me the Great Western train was also late through a cow getting on the line. Did not get down to Plymouth until one o’clock, and found Russell and Edward there.

We bundled off home as soon as possible, with Miss Fraser, Edward’s cousin, who came to be a bridesmaid. A jolly lively girl with very fine eyes and full of fun. Found all well at home. Mother progressing very well, suffering from rheumatism.

Next day was spent in packing Meta’s gear.

Being a rainy day took Father into Plymouth later on, when cleared up, for a stroll. Going over the Naval Hospital and then going to meet Bertie who came by the 6 o’c train. Russ and Amy Fraser also being there. Bertie has not grown much. I think he will pass safe enough and will turn out a fine manly and truthful lad, being very straightforward etc.

Sunday, we had a meeting of all the family, eleven in all including Father and Mother. Father offered up a Prayer, it is the first time for some time we have been all together, and I suppose it will be a precious long time, if ever we meet together again, unbroken in numbers.

Took Miss Fraser over the Resistance. It was great fun showing her over the ship for she had never seen a sailor before, much less a man of war, and asked in a very naive way which way the ship went.

It blew very hard Sunday night accompanied with rain, but Monday morning the wedding day broke with a beautiful fine clear sky, and as charming a day as could be wished for.

To my great relief and in fact to all of our relief, the marriage settlements came down from Inverness, for if they had not arrived the wedding must have been postponed as Meta had to sign her maiden name to it. Colin Mackenzie of the 79th came down as best man. Mrs Stevenson coming down on Sunday night, so we had a house full with all the family and guests.

Jenkins the boatswain of the Yard and Mr Moore were engaged from an early an hour putting up garlands and decorating the Dockyard. One big garland surrounded with flags being put up at the top of the house. Flags hung between all the trees and at the gates. An immense great garland triced up at the staff and numerous smaller ones about.

At 11 o’c the first carriage started, a goodly throng of the Dockyard people, who could leave their work, collecting on the roofs etc. of the adjoining houses, and the ropery women about a couple of hundred formed in front of the house, with favours and rosettes to see and cheer the bride off. I went up in the second carriage ready to receive my Mother, and I never saw Fore Street so crowded – being lined both sides. Whilst waiting in the porch I created some little fun by opening a Prayer Book and reading through the Marriage Ceremony.

The Bridesmaids and my Mother and Bride came up in the two last carriages and the procession forming as well as it could in the church, filed up to the altar. Father taking the bride, followed by the bridesmaids – and Mother going up on my arm leading young Baldie.

There was a tremendous row at the beginning of the service and I held up my hand for silence and old Beal stopped once or twice – people climbing on each other’s backs etc. In a short time the splice was effected and Meta Hall became Meta Grogan, and I felt somehow, a sort of feeling I was losing a sister, as the ring was put on.

Dear Mother was only just able to go through the business. Meta, although she had no sleep, or precious little the last few nights, was looking very well and Francie looking very pretty, as she always does, the puss. In taking dear Meta to the carriage, she had her veil dragged off there was such a crowd, and we had great difficulty in getting Mother and all away, without being knocked about.

The breakfast like all others, lots of food, with a big cake in middle, to which dear Meta gave the first cut. Father and Edward only made speeches, on account of Mother’s state of health.

At 2 pm the happy couple drove off, amidst a shower of slippers and lots of rice, about 40 people were at the B’kfast, it being a quiet one on account of our being in deep mourning and Mother’s illness.

Took Mrs Stevenson and Amy Fraser down to ship to listen to band, going down to Captain’s cabin and sitting there.

On Tuesday (20th) Mrs S. left and I went in the afternoon, Russ and I taking Amy Fraser over Dky’d. in the forenoon. It was great fun showing her everything, she being so ignorant of everything concerning ships etc.

Went up by the 2.15 pm train and got to Waterloo at 11.0 and Greenwich 12 pm. Working hard to pick up what I’ve dropped behind.

Walked out yesterday afternoon to Shooters Hill and back an eight mile walk. This afternoon went and made old Paton’s acquaintance with Dickinson, who was very civil. I find he is a first cousin of my Mother’s, so one of mine also.

27 October – Tuesday

Saturday afternoon Meta and Ned came down to 5 o’c tea going over the Painted Hall and Museum, and yesterday Sunday we all went to Fleming’s in the forenoon and strolled about in the afternoon. Meta is beginning to regain her colour and looking much better. She said she was very happy etc. Of course I knew she would be, after being married 24 hrs, it changes a girl most wonderfully.

Paid Admiral Key a visit.

AT GREENWICH

3 November – Tuesday

Ned dined with me last Thursday.

Saturday last I ran up to town and out to Dulwich, leaving a card on Mrs Hutton, and back to Hill Street House. Went with them to make a call on Mrs Stevenson – by way of introduction, I smashed a globe shade.

We stayed to dinner, meeting Mrs and Miss Payton, old Malta friends. After dinner singing and music as per routine. Miss Payton having a very fair little voice for singing.

Meta not being very well, we got home pretty early, and did not turn out until 10 am.

Sunday morning. Edward and I going to Fleming’s and in the afternoon going out to Kensal Green to see my grandfather’s grave, but was unsuccessful, getting there too late.

Came down to College in the evening.

Yesterday (Monday) a class of 15 of us, began our first fencing lesson with small swords. Angelo sending a couple of men down. We take two lessons a week, paying two guineas for four months. Result of Saturday’s examination, I was about where I expected to be, three gunners being below me. Number above me, modesty forbids me to mention.

4 November – Wednesday

Bower and I walked down to Woolwich and joined about thirty other fellows, who went over the Arsenal.

We saw many interesting sights, the sealing of tube and welding, done under the 40 ton hammer. The model room was very interesting, it showing all the different guns. We also saw some guns of the Mary Rose sunk at Spithead in Henry VIII’s reign, after, or just before (I forget which) an action with the French fleet off Isle of Wight. We saw the shell being tested by hydraulic power and many other interesting sights.

Walked back with Hill, through the Artillery Barracks, which are of very large extent, and through Charlton, a very pretty walk, about three miles.

5 November – Thursday

Guy Fawkes day. Young Paton came to dinner with me and a bigger ass I never met. First he came in a cut away coat and I had to rig him up. Then he hardly opened his mouth the whole of dinner time and did nothing but taste all the wines, drinking none. After dinner he was rather worse and I was very glad to get rid of such a dummy.

The Gunners had a great orgy in the smoking room, dancing hornpipes, jigs, flings etc., and very much singing.

7 November – Saturday

Went up to town this afternoon, called on Mrs Wilson Fox and went out to Kensal Green. Heard from Amy Fraser and from Father, who kindly worked so hard for me and got the nomination for McDermott’s son. McD. is very grateful both to Father and me.

12 November – Thursday

Spent last Sunday in town and on my way to Church in the evening left a card on the Codringtons.

Monday last we had a big dinner to all the staff here, Admiral included, some forty in all. After dinner a select party met in the smoking room of the Gunners apartments and we danced flings, hornpipes, waltzes etc. winding up with Sir Roger, and did not separate until 12 o’clock.

Captain Campbell and Professor Lambert kicking their heels up in a most scandalous manner and I must say next day few of us felt fit to chase the wily x.

Heard from Russ, Amy Fraser and Father. McDermott’s son is too old to go up after all this trouble and bother.

Meta leaves today for Portsmouth and I go up to town to meet Father tomorrow. Everyone seems laid up at home.

16 November – Monday

Dear Meta must be getting near Queenstown now.

I left here at 3 o’c on Friday afternoon and met Father up in town – at London Bridge. We went to Charing X and had a good dinner, dear Father being in capital spirits (reminded me of the old days). We bundled off to Admiral Stewart and my Father made enquiries and had a yarn with him. He had just had a tumour taken out of his back. My Father told me he had written a very strong letter with regard to doing away with death vacancies pointing out what a large number, high in office, owed their advancement to it. No doubt that at present owing to the dreadful stagnation in promotion, Flag Lieutenants appear bad and I think the qualification should be raised, but the privilege not abolished. We went down by the 7 o’c train and got down at 9, and paid Meta visit. I slept at the Queen’s Hotel and Father at Captain Douglas’s.

Next day the 42nd embarked on board the Himalaya (Saturday 14 Nov) for Malta, being inspected by Sir Hastings Douglas on the jetty.

Father introduced Meta and Esme Stevenson to everyone and on Saturday night, they dined and slept at Sir Rodney Mundy’s. Places alongside Capt’n Grant is secured for them and once they get on blue water, they are to have a cabin to themselves. Everyone on board from Captain down, did their best and offered to do anything for Meta and Esme, especially Hudson – 1st Lieut. – and Osborne.

I’m very glad Father managed to come round, for it gave a certain amount of prestige and it is wonderful what a lot people will do for an Admiral with his flag up. Father and I made a visit to Sir Leopold’s and then to Florry Rawson, née Shaw, a young lady Father used to carry about as a child and baby.

Father went off at 2 pm for Plymouth, dear Mother being very unwell with rheumatism.

Dined with Capt. Brandreth, and got into his evening coat and waistcoat – something like giving a frigate a line of battle ship’s sail. Spent a very pleasant evening and met Baldwin Walker and Anson there.

Sunday got up early and walked down to the Dkyd breakfasting on board the Himalaya with Edward, Meta and Esme. Came down from Sir Rodney’s at 8 am and we cast off at 9, rather a beastly day, it drizzling a little. I went out to Spithead and came in with the Pilot, bidding goodbye to Meta, Edward and all of them on clearing off. I gave the 42nd three cheers, aided by the pilot and had a last glimpse of Meta on the stern gratings.

I got in in time to go to St Judes with Captain and Mrs Douglas. Paid Miss Moore a visit and saw Ethel and then came up to town.

18 November – Wednesday

Went to Angelo’s in the afternoon.

19 November – Thursday

Went to a small carpet dance at Lady Keys 4.30 to 6.30 and had rather fun, some thirty people altogether being there.

20 November – Friday

Some of us started in a cab after dinner for Woolwich; Bower, Heathcote, Prince Louis of Battenberg and myself, and to go to the Woolwich Ball.

We got there about half an hour too soon, and loafed about the rooms. They have a very good suite of rooms and a great deal of plate. I believe more than they can put on the table. About ten we commenced dancing and kept it up to a late hour. Bower’s cousin Mrs Forbes of the 92nd dancing very well. The string band played beautiful music.

22 November – Sunday

Made a lot of calls in town yesterday and spent this afternoon with Colonel Day, dining there. Dr Carey of Brixham, having written to him, to look me up.

Heard from Meta and Edward from Queenstown, poor Meta being very sea-sick.

26 November – Thursday

Bertie and I lunched with Admiral Key. Bertie being up here to pass into the Service. 18 were turned back yesterday at the test. I think Bertie has passed, he has only one more day of it. Went in the afternoon after study to a carpet dance at Lady Key’s.

28 November – Saturday

Ran up to town and to Angelo’s and had a fencing lesson. Heard from Lord Ashley – coming to lunch. Wrote any amount of letters at Wanderers’ Club. Bought Mr Gladstone’s Expostulation on the Vatican Decrees.

30 November – Monday

Came out moderately well in examination, but don’t feel satisfied with my position on the list and must make a good push to get ahead; that is to say if the human machine will stand it, for I’ve got a good strain on it at present and a nasty cough not to be shaken off.

Was very glad to be told by Admiral Key that Bertie had passed number twelve. All the Naval Officers’ sons have gone through well. Shot a telegram off to Bertie – the Admiral having sent one home, similarly to what he did eleven years ago, when I passed at Portsmouth.

5 December – Saturday

Had Miss Atkins and Amy Fraser down to 5 o’c tea, Bower assisting me to show them about the place and entertain them.

Had hard work during the past week. Lambert pushing us ahead at a tremendous rate. I shall be uncommonly glad when it is over – like the man sentenced to the treadmill said to the judge.

11 December – Friday

The day before yesterday I went out to Mr Broomhall’s to an evening party. I arrived there at 7 o’c and renewed his daughter’s acquaintance, for it appears that they had been on board the Resistance at our dance at Moville and I had been taken in tow by them at that dance – a Miss McClellan also staying in the house remembered me.

I had to plead guilty of not having such a good memory as the fair young lassies had of me, which was not to be wondered at considering the number of people we had on board.

The eldest Miss Broomhall is engaged – the second is a young lassie about twenty, and very pretty, full of life and fun. I never felt so sorry about not being able to dance that new trois-temp – for I could not waltz with Miss Nellie B --. We kept up dancing until 4 o’c in the morning, and precious tired I was then, eight hours being enough to knock up any Christian.

I slept like a top until 9 o’c only waking up once at 6 o’c, and after breakfast, got down to the College by 11 o’c; and on top of all that I had to dig a trench for two hours and a half, besides all the study hours.

In the evening (I did not go to Mess), I went to the Lecture Hall and heard the Bishop of Rochester speak at a meeting held of Sunday School Teachers. The place was crammed full, principally women, I should say about 500. The Bishop spoke well and earnestly and was followed by another clergyman who also spoke to the point, some very strong home truths.

Heard from home. Meta and Edward have located themselves outside the Dockyard in Vittoriosa, the 42nd being stationed that side.

1875

12 January – Tuesday

Greenwich. I’ve been putting off the painful occupation of writing my journal up in sanguine hopes that I should have the pleasure of writing I saw some hope of my dearly beloved Mother’s restoration to health, but, alas! this morning took away the last strand, I had been holding on to. It appears that before I went home for my Xmas leave, I was not informed of the true state of her health, in case it threw me off my examination.

On first getting home, although of course a little surprised at my Mother still suffering somewhat, I was not shocked. But in the evening, I had a long talk with Russell and from what I heard, the grave nature of her illness at once struck me.

It appears about a month back, that Dr Square had hinted to my Father something about it, and it had almost made him ill, thinking of it and quite frightened them both. But between them all, Russell doing a good deal, they were quieted, at least my Father was, for I’ve always doubted whether my darling Mother has not kept an inkling of it in her heart.

Russell wrote to Uncle James and he with Aunt Isabel came down and I found them there on my arrival, coming down as they said for change of air, so as not to frighten my Parents. I had a long talk with Uncle James, and he told me the pith of the conversation he had with Dr Square. It gave me much misery and anxiety. I determined to make Square tell me everything, his next visit.

25 December – Christmas Day. We all sat down together and had our prayer together. Robbie went a few days after to Forster’s to cram up for the Control, as he goes up next month. Miss Fox left and a new governess came, Miss Brigstock, an elderly lady, and I think will be a great help to darling Mother, and a comfort to her.

Uncle James went day after Xmas and got into a collision, narrowly escaping severe injuries. Poor Aunt Isabel, besides all the anxiety for dear Mother, which she knows all about it, lost her sister up at North Berwick, who died very suddenly.

When Square came next – after his visit, I took him into the Drawing Room and put every question I could think of to him, to know the true state of my Mother and a sickening hope that at the bottom of my heart, of something favourable coming out.

I told him that one of the family at least should know everything so as to be in readiness for any emergency – and I think he told me everything. I left him with my heart changed, tasting for the first time, the utter bitterness of the thought of losing one’s dearly beloved Mother. I never knew how much I loved her.

After the interview I knew it was only and I will say, is now only, in God’s power and Gracious Love to spare her – and Oh! may God grant it may be so – for Jesus Christ’s sake, our only Advocate and Thine only Son.

I had to keep up a smiling face and wear a gay appearance, when my heart was aching. It seems almost to reproach me and I could not have done it, but that I would and could not miss any opportunity of keeping my parents in good spirits – and it is most essential for the family that Father should remain at the Docky’d. and for darling Mother, to keep her up.

Square told me I was not to tell them anything and I feel justified in not saying anything to them. This morning I heard from Aunt Isabel (who goes North tomorrow, already to return with Uncle James, when the real truth and state of the case is made known to my Parents).

She saw Square yesterday and he told her the local symptoms are on the increase and by that he meant the tumour was growing again, and she then said “Do you dread any outbreak of the tumour and will it then be manifest to all what it is?” He said – “That is what will happen and Sir William must know then” and she said “Can you fix any time? ” He said, “No, no” and he said she could not be moved and must by no means be far from her family or friends. So goes my last hope. I believed I may say in hope against hope, and I pray God to help us all.

14 January – Thursday

Ran up to town yesterday and met Aunt Isabel at Paddington and located her about the place having tea at the Euston Hotel, (then finding we had not enough money to pay, so I had to go and explain to the Cashier, a young lady, who consulted another young lady, and at last they said they would trust me. So I sent my servant out this morning and made him get the P.O.O, particularly impressing the directions on him and he immediately goes and posts the letter, bringing me the P.O.O back).

I saw my Aunt off by the Mail to Glasgow. I had a long talk with her, she had told me the pith of her interview with Square in her letter. My darling Mother had whispered in her ear, (at parting). “Do you think I shall ever get better? ” All she could say was “God grant you may”, but I can see now more clearly than ever, that as far as man is concerned, he can do nothing more.

Mrs Lindlay sent me a splendid tea cosy and letter of introduction to Mr Bruce. I don’t feel fit to write letters or go anywhere, but I must make Mr Bruce’s acquaintance to try and get Russell a billet, for Aunt Isabel tells me he is just the same as ever.

18 February – Thursday

More than a month ago, since I jotted everything down. I’ve been out to several places, going out with Rob last Saturday to the Huttons and staying until Sunday. Rob was up for a week passing into the Control, but as there are 15 vacancies for two hundred candidates, we are not very sanguine.

24 February – Wednesday

Night before last I was at work and suddenly hearing someone behind, I turned round and saw Russell with a genial smile on his face, and he informed me he was en route for Plymouth having missed the Fox at Liverpool. I made him comfortable for the night and yesterday went away after lunch.

Had another letter from Digan. I’m getting very anxious to go home for a short time, but knowing that I can’t and that if I worried myself at all, I should break down with all the mental strain. I’m obliged literally not to think at all hardly of my invalid Mother, for I can’t do so at present, however at Easter I shall spend the days at home and devote myself to her.

This week is most tremendous strain on me, the worst week I’ve had yet and a hard examination, on Saturday.

27 February – Saturday

Heard from Father and Russ this morning as well as from my Aunt. Russell has got a billet, £80 per annum, until something better turns up, so he will be up in town in a few weeks.

Russell tells me my darling Mother knows all, or nearly so, and appears resigned and talks so unselfishly of taking care of my dear Father, and what she is going to leave us. It almost unmans me. I dare not think of it for I’m afraid of breaking down, which would be very serious to me, burdened with debt. How I long to be with my Mother.

Paid a visit this afternoon to Kensal Green and wrote Uncle James about my grandfather’s grave stone not been up a month and already paint coming off.

20 March – Saturday

Saw the University Race from steam launch by Barnes Bridge. Oxford beat Cambridge hollow. They did not seem to be pulling so very hard to me.

23 March – Tuesday

Examination all over and I’ve managed to do very well.

6 April – Tuesday

Back last night from my Easter leave and I never felt so low and desponding at heart at leaving home. My patient loving Mother – Oh! I can’t tell what a patient self sacrificing woman she has been – so thoroughly unselfish – self denying. Takes the heart out of one, to see her suffering and her loving resignation and when my dear old Father, who is going about with such a heavy load to bear, for there is no doubt that at the bottom of his heart, he fears the worst, but won’t think of it and fights against it. I’ve not the least doubt that he is aware that there is, humanly speaking, but faint hope of saving her life, but that he won’t think of such a direful calamity.

It raises in my mind a kind of dull despair when I think of all the little children and my dear Father. I know it is not right and I pray to Jesus to give me strength and faith to bear everything aright. And Oh! that Jesus the loving Saviour, who can sympathise with us in all our sufferings and sorrow may see fit, in spite of doctors, to let her recover. Oh! God, with what tears of joy we would thank Thee – but if Lord Jesus thou should’st see fit to take her – Oh! my God, we pray – so fervently sinners as we are – grant for Jesus’s sake she may not suffer the dreadful pains.

I asked Dr Square on Saturday (and how I loathe putting on the air of indifference I’m obliged to, to get information though little now is required) how much longer he thought my saintly Mother could live. Until June? I said – Yes, not likely to show itself in its malignity before that. My heart and mind are too full of her to write much, the thought of losing her is too great a grief.

14 April – Wednesday

I wrote Henry about a week ago, telling him how depressed I felt. I got an answer from him this morning and to my delight he came himself from Portsmouth in the forenoon, en route to Woolwich. He lunched with me and then after showing him the Painted Hall and Museum etc., we had a long talk.

He prayed so beautifully and earnestly for dear Mother and for all of us and spoke so lovingly and feelingly I never knew what a warm heart he had, long as I’ve known him. He quite cheered me up and read from God’s Book, expounding so well and simply. I felt quite a different being after talking to him. Poor fellow I did not know until today, that he had lost his married sister, last year, at Charlton, during her confinement.

He said goodbye to me after staying three hours. I wish I had him always near me. I never knew anyone who had such an intense love for his Saviour.

Heard from Mrs Stepney, who sent me a cheque for £3. Edward having offered Mr R. £9.10 and as he was rather rude old Ned sent it back to me, with the advice not to give him another chance. I must say, knowing the state of my finances, I think it was very foolish of Mr R. refusing the money sent him.

Had a line from Ned this morning.

25 April – Sunday

Have taken Woodhead as my Agent, and told him I want some money advanced, he was very civil and agreed thereto, knowing as he does how it was through no fault of mine, I’m so deeply involved.

Met Father at the U.S. Club last Friday week the 16th. Poor fellow he seemed to know and fear the worst, the wound telling for itself, as he has assisted to dress it, and seen it of late. He prays earnestly for resignation.

–––––––––––––

AT DEVONPORT - ON LEAVE25

20 August – Friday

Having dropped writing in my journal for some time – I must begin again and can’t do better than note on the first page my Father and my visit to Allan Bone, the lawyer drawing my Father’s will up.

He has been at it for some time, not on account of the large amount to be distributed on my Father’s death (which God grant may not be for a long time), but owing to the large amount to be done with a small sum, and partly on account of the £1000 to be given me. I asked him (Bone) if it would not simplify matters my not having the £1000. As he said it would – I begged Father to leave it out, which he has done, leaving instead a legacy of £300 (cancelled). Not that I want a penny, except I don’t see why I should be excluded for others who may not deserve it a bit more than I do. However if I’m spared I shall do very well on my pay and be able to assist others.

Admiral Chamberlain makes himself very much at home here, and quite right too. I like him, he is always so very jovial and pleasant. He and Father have many a long yarn together after the family go off to bed. Meta is provokingly well, would that she were not.

24 August – Tuesday

Story about the Duke of Somerset a very penurious man – who went to the village barber to be shaved – The barber said to his son, a yokel “Mind you always say Your Grace to the Duke when he comes in.” The Duke sat down – Yokel having made preparations began, “For what I am going to receive may the Lord make me thankful.” Duke stared, Yokel repeated it – The Duke flew in a passion, imagining the man was pulling his leg – “The rascal” he cried; “Wait till I’m shaved.”

25 August – Wednesday

Dear little Francie’s 15th birthday last Saturday, Russell was 20 on the 11th – Baldie was 7, and on the 14th I was 25, and we daily hope to welcome another August bird, from the Grogan breed.

31 August – Tuesday

Poor Admiral Chamberlain after having been raised to the seventh heaven is dashed down to the mundane regions again, for on Sunday night we determined to move out of this house, Edward swearing he knew his mother so well, she would be only too glad to take Meta in, and wrote to her, saying, if she did not telegraph, we would send her up, with Edward to Rutland Gate.

We made all arrangements yesterday, so as to break the family up, some staying at the General’s; Father, Francie and I at the Keppels. Got seats reserved in railway carriage etc., Meta bidding goodbye to Jessie Kirk, and giving a kiss to Harry Keppel in public, which actually made him blush. Father having sung out to her to do it. He never blushes when done in private.

8 pm. Edward rushed into my room, with a telegram from his mother, saying the house would not be ready until the 8th so we threw everything over, altered all our plans, and hunted for lodgings for Meta.

This morning, tokens of her confinement gave notice to us. Swan came and declined to move her even in lodgings, so we stay in this house for the 6 weeks now and Admiral Chamberlain has been very kind saying if at the end of that time she is not well enough to be moved, he will consider Edward, Meta and Baby his guests. 2 to 1 it is a boy. Who takes it?

On Thursday, or rather Friday, Grannie takes dear little Francie on to the Fowlers, and then goes on to London. It will do Francie much good a fortnight’s stay in the country, previous to school.

1 September – Wednesday

Wednesday 6 am. At 5.11 am this morning, Master Grogan through God’s mercy and love saw daylight. Mother and child doing well.

7 September – Tuesday

Henry Hickley and Dawkins the two Captains of Iron Duke and Vanguard arrived here yesterday, and came for sympathy to my Father. They are both old midshipmen of his and they were messmates together.

Hoskins also looked in, he told us he was going as Commodore to Australia, and asked me if I should like to go with him. I told him yes, but of course there are many things to look over first. Leaving my Father, how far duty should give way to affection, then there is my gunnery course to finish etc., so I don’t suppose I shall see the Banks and Braes of Sydney yet awhile. Had a yarn with Batt who told me there was very little chance of getting Vanguard up.

14 September – Tuesday

During the last ten days, a good many deputations have been airing themselves and their tongues. The first was a ring from the women of the Ropery in memory of the meetings and interest shown to and in them, by my loving and sainted mother.

The second deputation waited on Father at 8 o’c one evening, bearing a very handsomely framed and handsomely illuminated address and uncommonly nicely worded. There were three men in the deputation – two of them being quite respectable conservative workmen – the other fellow by name Jones, was a rampant radical and amused us very much talking about Packington and Lennox saying when they talked to them they (the workmen) knew how to repartee back.

They stayed some time stodging themselves with heavy 1/6d cake especially bought for their delicate stomachs. The other deputation was from the Band of Hope boys, a very handsomely bound book.

The Court Martial on Captain Dawkins etc. is still going on, and likely to last for some time. Admiral Tarleton was examined yesterday and made such curious remarks that may possibly, and should, lead to some notice being taken of them. In fact I think it will not be long before he is unshipped. Lady Keppel persists in going to hear and gloat over the evidence. She was criticising some of the questions asked by Members of the Court to Admiral Chamberlain – a Member – at 5 o’c tea this night. Very bad taste. She at last provoked old C. to quietly, but most effectually put a check stopper on her.

Did showman to a party of ladies and boys round the Yard today. On Friday I move up to London with all the family, excluding Father who comes up on Monday.

IN LONDON - ON LEAVE

I moved up to London with all the family, and set out from Plymouth well stocked with grub, and should have been with drinkables, but shortly after leaving Plymouth, on one of the little ones asking for a drink, I found the basket with the milk and water had been forgotten. I told them to hang on, and vainly endeavoured to stave their thirst and stop their mutinous cries, by investing largely in fruit; it but stimulated them all.

So trusting I might not lose the train, I made a bold dash out at Bristol with the whole lot, filled them with water and bought a bottle of water which Ella of course let fall, just after leaving the station.

We managed to fetch up all right, and I safely deposited Mademoiselle, Edith, Ella, Baldie and Elizabeth at the lodgings, 24 Hatherley Grove.

Russell and Robbie met me at the station and told me about their scheme of going to California.

Father came up to town a few days afterwards and had an interview with Robbie refusing to see Russell. It was a most stormy one at Aunt Fanny’s lodgings. Russell who was waiting outside refused to go to California, and Robbie would not go without him. Russell funked it at the last moment (starting next day) and I’m glad now he did.

Eventually Robbie went out to the Cape with a friend of Father’s, a Mr Ansdell, who promised to look out for him and that he was pretty sure of getting billet for him. Father went down to Plymouth with him in the Cape Mail and parted fully reconciled to him. Took him ashore to church with Edward and saw dear Meta there. After it was settled, Robbie was to go to the Cape, I was busy in the City, getting back some of his gear. Good suits of clothes sold for 5/– bought back at 6 times the value. I could not have believed the way they had gone on, immediately after darling Mother’s death and promising so fair the whole time.

–––––––––––––

AT PORTSMOUTH

4 November – Thursday

Robbie went to Cape – I joined the Excellent 1st October – Meta and Edward sailed for Malta this afternoon. Russell still in town. He has seen Father.

I find the work on board here is splendid for the health, I’m literally running over with it. The Military Gymnasium I find a capital place to go to, three times a week, fencing etc., I was never so hard up in my life as I am now.

Yesterday I got a very economical fit on me and thought I’d begin at once, start with giving your servant only 8/– for wages. I tried it on, he took it, looked at it and then said he had been accustomed to 10/–. I refused it and then he said he had been accustomed to 10/–. I refused point blank to increase it, but on turning over in my mind I argued, it is better to pay 2/– extra and have a contented servant. So much to his delight, I told him I’d give him 10/–, so began and ended my first essay at domestic economy.

Transporting and dismounting all day. Old Wilmot gets lost in rapturous musings over the front part of the slide most of the time. For a wonder Goodlake was sweating like a horse, for he is by way of being a dumb sheave.

Asked C – d for leave yesterday, as I wished to see Meta and Edward off to Malta, refused it most decisively.

Have lots of work to do aboard here – not like a soldier, looking for a hard day’s work.

14 November – Sunday

Oxley joined as Commander the day before yesterday, superseding Cleveland. I cannot congratulate the Lords of the Admiralty on their appointment. Blowing a hard SW gale, the old ship knocking about a good deal for her. It is to be hoped we don’t take a cruise up the creek.

Russell writes me that he is in hopes of marrying A.C. I never met a fellow so blinded with self. Her writing and meeting him is only to make use of him. I told him so and urged him to strike out a profession for himself, but his future is uncertain. I often wonder what he will settle down to, if he ever does settle at all. Meta and Edward had a rough time of it out to Gibraltar. They ought by this time to have reached Malta.

Rather an amusing thing occurred on Oxley’s joining. He came down to the ship or rather abreast the ship in plain clothes, and I suppose did not look a very great swell, for on his going off in one of the boats, a gunner also desiring to go off to the ship, went in the same boat – The Gunner observes – “I hear the new Commander joins today.” Oxley: “Indeed, what is his name?” . The boat being alongside did not allow of this interesting conversation being continued. On Oxley’s arriving aboard he shifted, put on his sword and came down on middle deck to join, and came face to face with our friend the Gunner, who was also on duty as Officer of the Watch, with a belt on. Gunner’s feelings I believe were rather painful at first.

16 November – Tuesday

Been firing at target this afternoon, made some good shots. Called on Oxley’s uncle yesterday, Captain Waddilove. Sent off a sealskin vest to Father and which, with one for myself, I had made out of Meta’s old jacket. Tomorrow Florence Walker is to be married – my old friend. Got a filthy cold, chest and head, taken at fencing.

Everyone a bit eager with regard to the East. I’ve no doubt myself that matters must come to a crisis this time. It may possibly be only a partial one such as autonomy of Bosnia and Hercegovina. At any rate I hope we shall keep the Russians out of Constantinople – any nation but them.

Thursday. Dined last night at Captain Waddilove’s. Captain Peile, Risk and his wife, Cleveland and his wife and one or two others. Rather a slow dinner, but a very good one for the stomach, if poor for the mind.

Risk told us how Piper got into the Yacht this year. Sir Harry Keppel wrote a letter to Piper congratulating him etc. and wound up by signing himself “your affect old shipmate” and showed the letter to Risk who said – “Why Sir, you were never shipmates with him” – “Yes, I was out in China where he was shot through his stern by a Tapper and nearly died.” “No, Sir, that was Tyler.” “By G – so it was and I’ve got Piper the yacht thinking it was him, but no matter – Tyler is in the West Indies, it is no use now” etc. I hope I may be a victim to a mistake some day in a similar manner to Piper has been. I’ll not complain.

Been out shooting in the Bloodhound, Spithead – I’ve made v.g. shooting all round.

Russell writes me from a new place, I suppose his old place is too hot for him.

–––––––––––

19 December – Sunday

Since last writing I received a visit from Russell about three weeks ago, who dined and slept on board. And the week following I ran up to town and spent Sunday at home, about the thickest fog I’ve seen in London occurred, the day before – just able to distinguish houses opposite.

I had some good skating for three or four days at the Hilsea Lines and Forts on the Gosport side. I had not put on my skates for sixteen years yet I managed to go ahead all right. Had a service dinner with Captain Brandreth.

Russell has lost his position on the staff of the Standard. What a pity it is he has not more principle and more truth, for he has talents, but his character is very weak and devoid of all principle, which he won’t see, and he allows anyone to steer him, or make use of him.

Francie is getting on very well at school, I’m glad to say, and I feel sure her character is getting well moulded. She has a very fine one, and only wants careful training to make it come out most beautifully, and there is where the child will miss her loving Mother (six months ago she was with us), for no one can take a mother’s place – even a Father cannot approach it. At this distance of time, it breaks me down to think much of my Mother. I never knew until I had lost her the intense love I bore her. The heart knoweth its own bitterness! How true that is.

Yesterday a German artillery officer came on board and after going over the ship, we went ashore together. He is a Saxon stationed at Metz. He told me that all promotion was by Selection in the Army, and he had been 6 years, 8 being the average. He did not strike me as being very well informed on things in general.

My leave commences Thursday next and I get ten days, and mean to enjoy it beaucoup.

Sir Houston Stewart is dead – an Admiral of the Fleet and my Father’s old Admiral and Captain, a fine gallant old seaman gone.

1876

5 January – Wednesday

Just returned off my ten days Christmas leave which I spent in town. Christmas Day we spent very quietly. Russell came out. Woodrow, whom I asked to come out and spend an evening with me never turned up, it appears he lost the address. We waited an hour for him and nearly gave us all indigestion.

I took the whole family to Madame Tussaud’s, a tremendous crowd there, being Christmas week..

Thursday last I took Father, Francie and Bertie to the Crystal Palace. I had not been there for 15 years. We spent a very pleasant afternoon there, and had luncheon in the grill room. Had as our vis-à-vis, the master of the ballet and his wife. We stayed and saw part of the pantomime and then walked down to Dulwich to Mrs Hutton’s, who made us stay notwithstanding every effort we made to get away. We did not leave until 9 pm. They were most kind. The two eldest girls played duets from the score Lohengrin and Il Barbiere, and well they played it.

We all made another day excursion down to Eltham, to pay Sir Michael Seymour and the Mackenzies a visit. Sir Michael gave me his photograph and told me a very interesting account of his career in the Service.

I met Captain Sullivan at my Father’s Club, and if what he and his brother, the Admiral, says is true, there is no doubt he has been most unjustly treated in being superseded from the London. I should be very glad indeed to see Adm. H. unshipped from the Admiralty for although I’m sure he is just, yet he is narrow minded and lacks sympathy; more Lord St. Vincent’s style, than Ld Nelson, and I expect yet he will leave, either hoist his flag, or make his bow, on half-pay.

The fact is I think the Navy is in a bad way and its officers are as a rule inexperienced, a great deal through lack of sea work, and also a great deal through this monstrous cramming going on – and we shall see yet, the Authorities will have to do something. We are in fact resting on our laurels instead of hardening and toughening the minds of men and officers by constantly letting them knock about at sea and placing them on their own resources. We sacrifice everything to chase xxx – and our officers are more like artillerymen than successors to their forefathers seamen. I feel very disgusted at times.

Paid a visit Hampshire Telegraph to last night. Received a Bill for £102 [?] and receipt for 9/– Cheerful!

9 January – Sunday

Shooting at target all Friday, bitterly cold and snowing hard, so as may be imagined, the shooting was not very good, the highest, Wilmot, being 55 out of 80. I made 38, first having 2 spare, to pass out of class. Only 6 out of the 13 got the necessary points; 36. Goodlake just saving his bacon, being 33 at the last shot but one, the last shot gave him 3.

We had a big dinner party at Woodrow’s and Dickinson’s lodgings last night. Donner, Williams and a Sub, appelé Fisher, with myself dining there. Had a very pleasant evening aweigh. Freezing hard so hopes of skating. Heard from Nellie H – this morning, and also from Malta. Am sticking to my work pretty close. Hope to gracious I shall get 1st.

Admiral Chad’s appointment to the Nore instead of Farquhar, has rather surprised people.

14 January – Friday

Oh! agony, my chilblains I shall go mad. I’ve been applying sal-ammoniac to them for the last two hours (my father’s recipe). It has done them some good. We, the gunnery long course Lieuts, finished our musketry instruction yesterday. Woodrow and I are the only two marksmen out of the lot and in fact I’m the only one that went through everything, judging distance etc. without failing. Altogether I made 124 points in the three periods, W. made 120. The first two periods we were firing in wind and snow, very hard luck, but now I’m entitled to wear the cross muskets. Several others, notably Langley, Williams and Wilmot ought to have been marksmen, but fortune was against them. As it was they nearly got it.

Went with Ommanney to his school last night, and expounded to the youth on fractions etc.

27 January – Thursday

Feel a sense of relief come over me when the thoughts of speedy release from this gunnery grind steal o’er my oppressed brain.

March 20th, I believe sends us to Woolwich.

Ran up to town, figuratively speaking, Saturday week. All well at home. Robbie has started on £100 a year at Cape. Russell another billet, beginning at £50, which with his £100 to £120 a year ought to do him.

Dined with Pearson and wife night before last. A very pleasant party – we had some singing – Miss Gibbs singing very well. They managed to get me on my legs two or three times.

Made a stupid mistake, Annie C. wrote me in Lady C’s name and like a donkey I answered her. It looked as if I must have done it on purpose. Last Saturday I went out to Waterloo and back, some 12 miles, and ran off detail for Rifle, during the walk. Coming back, I met Langley doing the same thing. I’m sick of it and long for the smell of salt water.

––––––––––

IN LONDON - ON LEAVE

27 April – Wednesday

Took the family to the Polytechnic. We got there when it was quite dark, on account of something going on, and most amusing mistakes happened. Granny taking hold of some young fellow’s arm and in her hasty quick way. “Here come along George” much to the surprise and amusement of said young man. Francie getting hold of little boys, in mistake for Baldie.

13 May – Saturday

A Levée at St James’ Palace.

Well, my Father and I got the tickets and went through the usual formalities at the Lord Chamberlain’s office some few days previously. We hired a brougham of Mr Newman and cautioned him to rig the coachman in our livery and to pay due regard to his toilet. Monday came, a fine day, and at the proper time we got into our peacocking rig. Father looked very well with all his medals and orders across the breast (worn as desired by HRH).

The servants were most anxious to see us, so we came to in the dining room, and presently whispered voices were heard. Then Eliza’s head peeped in, withdrew, a shriek – Anne’s head – ditto – – do – “Oh my!” repeated several times, and then having regained the proper amount of courage came in, and stood admiring our noble selves saying “Oh my! How grand! Oh my ! Oh my!”.

Nurse came in, Granny having sent for her. She came in like a bashful girl, held up both her hands and said – “Oh my!” Then Granny said “Don’t you think Mr George look grand? I know what I should do if I was a young lady” – (I suppose she meant run up embrace and kiss me).

Off we started, and got at the doors of St James’ Palace before they were opened and found a gang of about 50 officers waiting outside, or more, principally of the Naval breed. Admirals, Generals and lesser fry, all waiting and pushing like a lot of schoolboys. Some grey-bearded warriors, engaging their neighbours in conversation, and slyly edging up to the door, but most of these neighbours were up to snuff.

At 1 o’c precisely doors were opened and in we all rushed, helter-skelter, Father showing me the way. I holding on to his skirt, we slid in between Lords, Dukes, Generals and all such fry, up the stairs, turned to the left into a large room, still pushing, elbowing, scrambling, cursing (no, I mean apologising) and round barriers we at last halted, about three yards from the closed doors of ante-room. But Father was not satisfied until we got right up to top which we did. I heard several ‘sojers’ saying “We don’t wan’t the Naval Brigade here – Confound those epaulettes.”

I got next Sir John Hay and some Irish Lord, and saw all the swells who had the entrée, go in, that is who are presented before the crowd, viz: Ambassadors, Ministers and like swells. Sir John and this other fellow knew their names and so we whiled away the hour we were waiting.

At last the doors were thrown open and in we filed, single file, through the ante-room, into the presence chamber. The Prince of Wales, Duke of Edinburgh, Dukes of Connaught and Cambridge – and one or two other German princelings, all standing, were in front of Throne. Father went round first and shook hands with them all. I followed making my bow to them all and doing the side or closing step, and then retired into the ante-chamber. It was all over, and I had been presented.

Met an old shipmate Lord Ramsay, who is equerry to Duke of Edinburgh. After Father had chatted with some of the big-wigs, Count Gleichen amongst them, who said, “He made as much by his work as a sculptor as the Government gave him.”

We then levanted out of St James’ Palace and with Admiral Chad, walked up Pall Mall to our clubs and then into our carriage and home; previously having cautioned driver not to sing out “Wot name Sir” on putting us down, and also giving him his fare on the road so as not to be haggling on pavement in full uniform and cocked hat. We did the whole business in three hours, very quick work.

Fancy Dress Ball at the Mansion House on Tuesday May 30th. Mrs Hutton wrote to me and asked me to accompany her, so I accepted and I determined to go in Full Uniform. The night arrived, I rigged up and put an Ulster coat on, hailed a Bayswater Bus, got on top, paid 6d and was put down at the doors of Mansion House.

Amidst My Lords and My Ladies I marched in, heard my name yelled out “Lieut. Hall”, walked up a row of guys and a made a bow shaking hands with the Lady Mayoress, and then stood to one side to amuse myself looking at the other swells and nobs coming up.

Fell across Admiral Stewart and Madame and renewed my acquaintance with Grace and Kate. There were several Naval men there. Mr Goschen, and Irving the actor, I noticed amongst the notables in the crowd.

Nellie Codrington came up and shook me very warmly by the hand, begged me to come next evening to a dance at their house. I had the pleasure of dancing with Miss Heron-Maxwell rigged as a New Haven fishwife, to my mind the best rigged girl in the Ball Room, or Hall I should say, for we danced in the Egyptian Hall with the Coldstream Band playing.

The Huttons were there in full force. Minnie looking very pretty and classical. Nellie Hutton and I danced pretty often, and supped together. It appears, according to her, none of the family enjoyed it but myself.

I escorted the Stewarts and Huttons to their carriages and at 2.30 am took my departure and walked home, reaching it at 3.45 am it being broad daylight then, and the world just beginning to open its working eye.

Got up at 7 am took Francie to school and paid visits in afternoon. Captain and Mary Fowler came to town for couple of nights.

Wednesday and Thursday 31st and June 1st. Mary going to a cousin’s wedding. What a pity it is none of the Fowler girls are married; they are such nice girls, but the fact is they don’t go out enough, being kept so much in the country.

Went to the St James’s Hall, a concert given in aid of a charity, heard all the artists of the Drury Lane Corps. Came away very pleased.

On I went to the Victoria Station bound for Dulwich to witness the wedding of Minnie Hutton to Dr Rottenberg, German Attaché in the Prussian Foreign Office. Met several other fellows going down that way, also including Wyatt.

I got down to the house but found them all beginning to start for the Church, so I made the best of my way up to l’église, found it full, and at 11.30 am in sailed the bride followed by seven bridesmaids, the three little girls bringing up the rear.

After the ceremony was over, during which the bride remained very calm and composed, off we all went to the house. I got a lift down in someone’s brougham, and we all congregated in drawing-room for tea and coffee, and then went on the lawn to be photographed, and at 2.30, 105 of us went into tent, spread out on the lawn and sat down to breakfast. I took Mrs Savage in, wife of Lord Mayor’s Chaplain, and the daughter of the Lord Mayor.

She was very nice and pleasant and I don’t know what I should have done otherwise, as the breakfast was dreadfully long and tremendous lot of speeches, chiefly remarkable for maincues [?] and stupidity, being made – old Hutton floundering the most.

The happy pair toddled off at 4 o’c for Ryde, amidst a shower of rice. The rest of the afternoon was spent in cruising about until the cold collation was ready.

Made Plimsoll’s acquaintance. Had a yarn with him touching on the Maritime League, found he thought the Declaration of Paris should be annulled. Took the opportunity of letting him know what the Navy thought of MPs running from the House when Navy Estimates come on. After the collation, we had a dance, some of the Germans playing, Herr Schlesser, Francie’s music master, amongst them. Don’t care for Germans as a nation. I like them individually but not collectively. Was solicited to dance by certain young ladies with them. I felt a little ashamed of shining so strong in ‘Johnny Crapand’s’ speciality.

Did the Royal Academy with Father and Francie. Have been doing some fencing lately at Angelo’s.

Have been very busy lately with regard to erecting a tablet to the memory of poor Williams, one of the baker’s dozen, who whilst delirious threw himself out of window at Haslar Hospital, and picked up dead. When I heard of it, I was quite thunderstruck, having had a yarn with him just a few days previously at my Club, and the very day of the sad occurrence, having written to him, sending him my photograph.

Poor fellow, he had overworked himself, came to a shocking end, just as he had firmly grasped the rungs of distinction. I lost in him a friend, we used to have many yarns together. He had asked me to tell father that if the latter hoisted his flag in China, he should like to sail with him as gunnery Lieutenant.

Paid Lady Gilford a visit, she is very charming; and paid my Lord one, at the Admiralty. Just as well to keep up the acquaintance of one’s future Admiral and Chief.

Monday last, June 19th, went to the Floral Hall, to Mr Kuhe. Heard the artistes of Convent Garden sing and I still hold Patti the Queen of Song, then Nilsson, Albani, Tietjens, Thalberg. Don’t care for Marimon.

23 June – Friday

Went down by special train to Greenhithe in a saloon carriage with Lord Shaftesbury, Ladies Templemore and Edith Ashley, Sir Alexander Milne and several others. Sir A. Milne going down to give away the prizes to the Worcester Cadets. We got down at 1 o’clock and went off to the ship in a steamer and very soon after getting alongside, the performance began.

There were a great many friends of the lads on board. Her Majesty gives a gold medal away annually to the best seaman, and what constitutes such I transcribe in her own words. The boy is elected by his companions.

There were a great many prizes given away, to the value of £170, which is not bad considering that there are only 150 boys on board. Was introduced to Lord Shaftesbury. The usual speeches went on. Sir Alexander giving away the prizes and my Father gave them a speech on temperance, giving them several anecdotes which amused them very much.

Lord S. – also spoke very well, and told us that Lord Palmerston was one of his greatest friends and that fine statesman once said to him. “Now whenever I want anything done well, judiciously, thoroughly, heartily and cheerfully done, etc. where self reliance is needed, with tact and boldness, and thoroughly well done – I send for a Naval Officer.”

As may be easily imagined I listened to this with great pride and affection at hearing the Service spoke of so well, more especially as it is generally with the Navy Out of sight, out of mind.

We all had lunch below. I had a chat with Captain of the Somersetshire, the ship my Father got off the breakwater. He told me he never took any but English seamen in his ships and very nice he seemed. I found out he was an old Etonian. We got back to town about 5 o’clock.

29 June – Thursday

This day last year my poor Mother left us all, dying in my arms. I feel even now that my loss is too great to allow me to think of it. When I’m inclined to do so a feeling of despair and utter inability to grieve sufficiently fills my heart and perhaps it is best. I’ve no one to open my heart to and it would do no good thinking over it. I utterly and thoroughly worshipped her, she knew how I loved her. Now I yearn to see her again. She was a Mother and Woman. If time could speak, how much it would say of her, but stop, what is the use of writing one’s feeling to pen, ink and paper? None.

4 July – Tuesday

Robbie turned up and very glad we were to see him. He had grown a good deal and his hands and soles of his feet are like leather you wear on the soles of your shooting boots, so hard are they. It appears he arrived at Le Havre in the schooner with only a shirt and a pair of trousers to his name, so he got some money from the consul, got some decent clothes and came across. He has not altered much excepting grown a little rough. It appears he has had some very hard times and seen some rough scenes.

He told us some very amusing yarns, of how the Captain desired to put one of the crew in irons, and being rather afraid of him, stationed Robbie behind the door with a loaded pistol and to step out at the critical moment. However, R had not to use it. Another time the boatswain would call R’s family, names, so although R was smaller, he begged him to desist and on his refusing, threw himself into boxing attitude, got knocked down but in falling, seized the boatswain’s throat and not until his tongue being cut, would he promise R to keep a civil tongue in his head. After R had a good hot tub, he looked a deal more presentable. He is fond of the sea, and means to stick to it.

A few days ago Father, Francie, Mrs Stepney, and I went down to the training ships Arethusa and Chichester, going down by steamer and coming back by train. Lord S. gave away the prizes. The boys looked uncommonly well, and ships were simply perfection, so clean and neat. We had a grand lunch on the main deck. The boys were dressed in white and whilst manning the yards sang, and the ships all ablaze with flags. As may be imagined, it was an uncommonly pretty and pleasant sight. They are a healthy lot of youngsters. Ladies Templemore and Edith Ashley were there. We came back in the train, to allow Mrs S. to go to a concert at Lord Lawrence’s.

AT PORTSMOUTH

16 July – Friday

Joined Excellent and am now going through the Torpedo course, very easy times of it, it is too.

Robbie sailed yesterday as apprentice in the Bay of Biscay, a fine slashing vessel which runs to Rangoon and back. Takes seven months – takes out salt and brings back [?].

Robbie messes by himself, or rather with other apprentices, in an Upper Deck House, sleeping also there. Altogether he has started under fair auspices, and ought to be very thankful to his father for all the trouble he has taken and expense he has gone to, who, by the way, has just paid £5 for Russell, as a fine, on account of his not turning out with the yeomanry. Poor old Meta is, I’m sorry to say, having a touch of Maltese fever.

A most frightful explosion occurred aboard the Thunderer whilst running the measured mile on Thursday. Front part of boiler came out, 29 men killed and about 40 wounded and scalded. Captain Wilson having a very narrow shave. It appears the communication valve was closed and I suppose something the matter with safety valve. It is a most dreadful accident, the poor fellows are, and have been, in shocking agonies, their skin hanging in shreds. Some of them half mad with pain tore their clothes off bringing the skin with it. Some fellows had their heads taken clean off and it is one of the most shocking things I’ve heard for a long time, for there is such extreme agony connected with it.

The Queen has been most solicitous, with enquiries and telegrams, as has also the Prince of Wales.

26 July – Sunday

We had a most ludicrous scene in church, when the Hymn was given out the Schoolmaster played it very slow and Parry the Parson began going ahead, three times the pace. No one else singing, but leaving these two at work. After a time Parry stopped at second verse, Schoolmaster went on, most undauntedly. No one having opened their mouths. Parry thought we had better give Hymn up and stopped singing and looked at Schoolmaster to stop – but no, on went the Harmonium, scandalously played. Parry endeavouring to catch Schoolmaster’s eye, but he looked all the harder at his keys, playing still slower.

I whispered to Wynyard “Did you ever see such a ludicrous scene.” Parry kept making movements to go out of his pulpit, but lacked courage. At last he beckoned to a bluejacket and sent him over. The Harmonium stopped, a titter and a very audible one too going round.

Parry must have been put out very much, rattled over the Litany, and gave only a seven minute sermon, skimping it off 4 minutes. He had a quiet slap at the Non-Conformists.

The Goodwood Races coming off enabled me to get four days leave, commencing Wednesday July 24th and I went up to town with Russell, who had been down at Portsmouth a couple of days. The next day the whole family went off to see the Crystal Palace, taking our lunch with us, and it was well worth paying a visit to see Myers performing animals etc.

It was wonderful to see the Elephants and Horses doing everything. John Cooper shoved his head inside an elephant’s mouth. I should not have cared to have done that. As Bertie remarked: If any of his hairs had tickled the brutes mouth and caused it to sneeze, Cooper’s head would have been nowhere. Two fellows with the Caps were very good, also the same fellows playing the fiddles in all attitudes and gradually going to sleep, the latter being very comical and amusing.

Went with Russell to Evans in the evening, and heard some very good English and Scotch ballads. Also saw some good tricks done. Putting bowl of clay pipe in his mouth, stem up and balancing stem of another horizontally on top of stem of one in mouth, a sword being in bowl of second one, hilt out and perpendicular. He moved his head and gradually got the second pipe with sword in it, to revolve at a very rapid rate.

Robbie has now been a fortnight and two days at sea – this day Monday July 31st.

I came down last night, 3rd class with three other fellows. Bade goodbye to children as I may not see them for some time. Francie and Baldie going to Moffat, Edith and Ella to Temple Babal.

A piece leader in The Times on Navy, advocating the doing away with Adm. Superintendents. A greater mistake could not be made, the dockyardmen could fight like ‘Cat and dog’. The Times is very bitter against the Navy always. I suppose on account of their Special Correspondents not being bowed down to by Naval Officers. I’d hang them all at the Fore Yard Arm, if I had the power. They write such a lot of d--- lies.

20 August – Sunday

I’ve been going through the even tenor of my torpedo course, nothing very startling having happened during the last three weeks or so, and I hope to have passed this day fortnight and be appointed to a ship.

Alas! my hopes of getting a sea going ship have gone. There is none available, so I’ve asked to be appointed to the Coast Guard ship at Greenock – so as at any rate to be close to my friends and relations.

Captain Wilson of the Thunderer wished me to go with him, but Admiral Hornby is going to appoint a 1st and Gunnery combined – so I can’t go, not being senior enough for the first part of the performance. This long spell on shore is very depressing to anyone who is fond of the service and full of zeal.

There are a good many changes going on at the Admiralty. Yelverton née Milne, B. Seymour née Hornby (a very good job), Hood née Stewart, Hornby going to the Mediterranean and Stewart to the Channel and I hope shortly I shall see my Father appointed to the Coast Guard née Tarleton. He is the best man they could appoint, being just suited for putting life and fire into the Reserves, and making it popular.

Russell has been making a confounded ass of himself to put it mildly, attempting to bribe some of the Admiralty employees to give him information. A very dishonourable thing to do and brings shame and disgrace on his Father’s name.

This Torpedo class is much too big and too short a time is allowed for it. First of all it is only in a country like England that officers could be got to go to the expense of going through it on so called half pay. We are all so behind hand.

Other nations don’t go appointing 6 & 7 committees all on the same subject, and then take months and years coming to a decision like we do. For instance other nations, viz: Russians, Germans, French and smaller fry, have their 100 and 200 fast 22 knot Whitehead. We hope in November to have one to go 18 knots. Mr W. is turning them out at rate of one a day for the foreigners. His works are at Fiume and he employs 400 men in his shops.

To turn the subject, there are a great many dances going on here. I never knew such a place. I can’t say I care much for the style of girl you meet with at this fashionable watering place. They think of scarcely anything but dancing and picking each other to pieces. They are essentially a type of the pure garrison hack.

Affairs in the East are quieter, but I can see that if matters are patched up, it is only for a season, and I should not be at all surprised if Russia, forced into by her people, did not interfere. I think we should hesitate before plunging into a war on behalf of the Turk. He is undoubtedly the best man for us, but still he is worn out. If the Turk leaves Constantinople, we should hold Crete and Egypt.

My worthy Father came down from town, putting up at the Brandreth’s and was much interested. We blew up a lot of mines and other kind of things. Sent steam pinnace away with a couple of torpedoes, steered and worked by electricity, and everything went off most successfully, bar the weather.

The following Saturday, our dance on board the Excellent came off, and a very jolly day we had, some 5 to 600 people came off. We danced on board the Calcutta, and promenaded the Excellent. Russell came down with his friends Mr and Miss Maclure, from town. She is a fine large girl rather inclined to be tom-boyish. Maclure the brother seems a very decent sort of fellow, wants rubbing down with a refining brush. The dance was most successful. I made the acquaintance of a Mrs Southey who with her sisters, Miss Addisons, lives out at Roche Court. Mrs S. was very communicative with me, informing me she liked my dancing and telling me all about herself, her having married at the age of sixteen etc.

24 September – Sunday

Miserably wet and blowing hard, everyone in the College growling. Just returned from seeing Ethel Gilbard and Miss Spratt. Ethel has just returned from Gibraltar and is growing out of her embonpoint.

I came down from a week’s leave on Wednesday. Up in town, my Father showed me a letter from Admiral Hornby, offering me the Undaunted or the Queensferry ship. He strongly advised me to take the latter, for the Undaunted will be coming home in a year and a half. Also going to her as my first ship as a Gunnery Lieutenant, I should have to take things as I found them or in case I desired to make alterations, have very uphill work. And being in the Lord Warden at Queensferry, I can be on the lookout for a good ship and in case Lord Gilford hoists his flag in next Flying Squadron, be all ready to go as Flag Lieut. I trust the decision has been well made.

A Rear Admiral is to get command of the Reserves, a great disappointment to my Father, for if a Vice Admiral was to have got it, my Father was pretty sure of it. He takes it very well. The money difficulties worry him, but so much money has been thrown away on Russell and Robbie they have quite sapped the family tree. A great contest going on between spiritualists, and non spiritualists in the paper. A yarn my Father told me. A great mesmerist got hold of a very pretty woman and began mesmerising her, and said, “Now what am I doing?” “You are getting your handkerchief out” and so it went on, at last he said “Now what am I doing?” “You are just getting ready to get the H– c– a man can have.” – Exit Mesmerist.

The Admiralty are down here, came down yesterday. I spoke to Adm’l Stewart and Sir Leopold McClintock.

For the last month, nothing but meetings after meetings to protest against Bulgarian or rather Turkish atrocities in Bulgaria. Now, I’m all for that as long as it is not made a party affair. But Mr Gladstone, I should like to know what he would have done, if he was in Office.

It is wonderful what a difference putting the word ‘in’ for ‘out’ makes in the speeches and acts of politicians. There is no doubt Russia is playing a deep and treacherous game and one must discriminate between getting restitution from the Turks for the barbarity and playing into the hands of the deceitful and wily Muscovite, though I don’t believe myself the Russians will ever permanently be settled at Constantinople.

8 October – Sunday

Am anxiously waiting for my appointment to the Lord Warden for she is ready for commissioning. It looks as if the Authorities had not quite made up their minds as to whether to send her to Mediterranean, or not, for matters are looking very queer out there.

Friday last in the afternoon, I witnessed an assault of Arms at the Military Gymnasium. It went off very well, all the world was there.

In the evening went to see Morgan, Mesmerist, at St George’s Hall. He made some of those mesmerised do most extraordinary things. Made them cry, laugh, sneeze and kneel down looking at the Angels, the latter it was beautiful to see the different expressions on the faces of those mesmerised. The most finished actors on the London stage, I defy to come anywhere near these chawbacons, in the way of expression. They could not feel pain. The evening before at Bachelors’ lodgings, a few of us got my little round table in and sat round it about an hour and it lifted, knocked and went right over in a most gradual manner. We propose trying it still further. My unbelief in anything relating to spiritualism or in connection with it remains still unshaken. I know no one was touching or humbugging, I believe it has something to do with electricity and magnetism.

I see a good yarn in the West Country paper. Their Lordships have sent down to reprimand severely, an engineer student, who replied to an examiner in a facetious manner. On being asked, How he would proceed to get up steam? He replied, “Tauten your funnel stays, to arrange your draught, then look up to your Father, and say I am ready to go home if the front of the boilers should come out.”

Yesterday took a 3rd class return ticket to Havant and started from Havant at 5 to 1 and got to Chichester at 10 past 3, exactly 9 miles. Had a cup of coffee there and had a rough and hurried look at the Cathedral and got back to Havant by 6 o’c, doing 9 miles in 2 hours. I averaged 13 minutes to each of the last four miles.

The town of Chichester is small, consisting of four principal streets, leading to each of the cardinal points where they meet in what is called The Cross, something like a large Baptistery, built by the Normans. The spire of Cathedral is 300 feet high, the building has been destroyed several times. Close by the present building is a large tower, the remnant of one of the old ones. It contains some very old tombs up by the Reredos, of the time of the Saxons. The Cathedral is one of the smallest in England. The country is flat from the sea up to a range of low undulating hills, that run parallel to the coast, distant about 4 to 10 miles.

Met rather a buxom lass, on my way back, wheeling a baby in a perambulator, its head hanging over, in a dangerous way of breaking its neck. As I tore by I said “Don’t break the baby’s neck – “One thing” she said, “It won’t take long to get another.”

I got back in time for dinner and had a most refreshing bath. When I got back I was wet inside and outside, for the forenoon it rained hard and all the time up to 2.30 pm, so I got wet thro’.

26 October – Thursday

Last Friday I went up to town for a few days leave, returning last night. I got up just in time to see Father off from the Euston Station, I paid Francie a visit and had along talk with her. Miss McBean having stopped her leave, she could not come out for a walk.

Went on to my club, and met Russell, had a chat at St James’ Hall. Paid a visit to Miss Nelson – (Baroness Bronte) and heard some wonderful stories from her, with regard to the Russians in general, their corruption, peculation and quiet method of going to work in spiriting inconvenient people out of it. She is 72, and although I take all she says cum grano salio still there is enough truth left to leave no room for doubt, that she is most and has been most shamefully treated – vide, the Whitehall Review, Oct 21 1876.

We then went on to Drury Lane and got passed into the stalls and saw Richard III acted, I enjoyed it very much, Barry Sullivan acted very well.

Monday night, went and saw the Morning Post and Daily News papers being printed – and the process for the former paper is this. The manuscript being brought in, it is cut up into pieces and given to the compositors who begin setting up the type from about 9 o’c and it being piece work, they work very fast, and set up as much as they can, getting manuscript from the printer as required.

When all the type is set up – of course the reverse way, in which you read it – (although they can read it as quick one way as the other), it is put on a section of a drum or barrel and several of these are joined together. The type is now carefully inspected, and if any letter is seen wrong, or broken, it must be all slacked up and the fault rectified. No little trouble, and requires very delicate manipulation as the types are so thin and small. The types are then wiped clean, and rubbed over with a damp sponge, which makes them stick better together, and now these sections of drums go down to printing machine (in this case a Victory) – and the sections containing type for one side of sheet are laid and secured on the outside of a large drum, and sections containing type for the other side of sheet go on another drum.

a. Race of Paper damped 24 hours before

b. Printing Ink

c. Rollers for transferring ink to types.

d. Drums or Cylinders

e. Sections of drums containing type

f. cutter rollers

The drums revolve and as the paper passes between them and roller, M – the type is pressed on it – and marks the whole of one side of paper, and the paper travels on and is marked or printed the other side by the other drum, being cut at h, and thrown by n on a pile. Now this way of course you can only use one machine, unless you like to set up another set of types, which of course is never done, but the other papers with very large circulation, run into their types and then run lead into this impression, as many times as they wish.

The Daily News has five machines going, and are setting up a sixth. Of course with this method you can have as many impressions as you like from the type and set so many machines going printing. Machines used are Walters, same principle as the Victory, but ever so much quicker. The only disadvantage of the plan is, supposing you wish to insert something fresh, or alter something after machine is set going, you must take a fresh casting of the whole of that column. But with the former method you have only to stop machine and alter type.

The circulation is about: Daily Telegraph 200,000, D. Standard 100 to 160,000, Daily News 130 to 140,000, Times 45 to 50,000. Morning Post 6 to 7,000. The printing is generally done about 4.30, paper being sent out earlier. The printing machines at D. News (Walters) does xx a minute. The one at Times folds paper up – I got a lift out to Paddington in one of the news-carts, and got home about 6 o’c, had a couple of hours calk, and paid another visit to Miss Nelson.

Tuesday. Had a great row at my Club, and reported Steward to Secretary for officiousness, and imposition.

Came down last night and walked to station in town and from station here, with 24 lb dumb bells and heavy bag. My arms nearly dropped off. Landed with battalion this morning and engaged on board Lord Warden this afternoon.

18 November – Saturday

Still the Favorite has not come round to turn over to the Lord Warden although she started some ten days ago. The tug towing her came to grief, and not being able to steam herself, she has to wait for another tug being sent round.

Have been exploring the country in company with Prothero, round by Horndean, Waterloo, Wickham, Botley, etc., The country is very pretty, the other side of Portsdown Hill – Spent four or five days in town last week.

25 November – Saturday

The day before yesterday I went out in charge of Gun Boat Skylark and when I got out outside, I found a nasty sea on, as it was ebb tide, and blowing hard from the Eastward. I took the precaution of casting loose the two 64 Pdr slide guns when head to sea.

On turning round to take up my position from target, she gave a heavy scend, and the Nos 5 & 6, not attending the compressors and adjusting lever, out rushed the gun, dashed in again and out again. The belts of all three clip plates carried away and up cocked the gun carriage and would have gone overboard, gun and all, but that the drop bolt sticking up in front of the slide stopped it.

She was still rolling so heavily, that it was impossible to do anything, as the carriage had hopped on top of and in front of slide. I immediately put her head to sea and secured the gun, it took me an hour and a half doing it. I was very thankful no one was hurt.

Hear Arbuthnot is going to Alexandra as Gunnery Lieut so it will be a disappointment to Tim Barrow.

2 December – Saturday

This last week has been full of the Artico.

Tuesday the dinner on board the Excellent came off. I had young Rawson on my right and talked a good deal about the Expedition, of his experiences etc. It was a most successful dinner, everything was very nice and well arranged and we did not sit long which was a great blessing.

T.B. made a very good speech, holding up to ridicule the would-be detractors. Nares responded, he does not speak well, and made a great mistake in mentioning names.

Wednesday evening the McClintocks had an ‘Artie’ dinner and afterwards a soirée to which I went and met a great many old friends, Mrs Wilson etc. It was rather slow, for we had no music.

Yesterday I took the Hegans, one of the damsels being Wyatt Rawson’s engagée, over the gunnery Establishment. They are neither of them pretty, but are sensible nice girls. The step was very high for them to get into boat on going away, so Miss Hegan did not know what the dickens to do. “Oh what shall I do” “Jump!”, I said and held my arms out, she laughed and did so. I caught her most beautifully, and a pretty good armful it was.

Coming ashore I went into the Swainsons and as they had a small musical party of the Venners and McClean – the latter sang very nicely Sands of the Dee, or Bring the Cattle Home, and also duets with Mrs Swainson and Mrs Venner, who both sing very well, as does Miss Venner.

Down made very heavy running with Miss Venner, as bad as he did a few days before at his tea party. I really had to intervene for propriety sake. Am just going out to call with Down on the Venners in order to keep him within bounds. T.B. is going to Sheerness Dky’d and Herbert is coming here. Every one regrets the change very much. Met Fitz Roy, Captain of Alexandra who said I was late in the Field applying for her, but he said Bertie was going in her, so that will be a good thing.

19 December – Tuesday

Have been fully engaged during the time that has elapsed since I last noted down anything in this Journal, and the reasons for my not doing so have been many. Some friends of Down, named Venners, came round from Brighton to pay a fortnight’s visit to Southsea. They came in to the College, either to Down’s rooms or the Swainson’s house, pretty nearly every day – and being musical, both mother and daughter singing very well, we had some very pleasant musical parties.

About ten days ago, Down gave an At Home and it was most perfect. He asked some 80 people and dancing went on, to the strains of very good string band music, in the large study, which is blessed with one of the best floors about this part of the country. Partners were all very good and it certainly was a great success. After dinner we had a musical party in Down’s rooms consisting of McClean (the great amateur tenor), the two Venners, Mrs Swainson, Tim Barrow and Lang Foote – and we kept it up until after 11 o’c.

We had a most varied assortment of music. McClean, as he always is, sang until he was hoarse. Foote gave us his whistle valse, Tim played to us, besides which the Venners and Mrs Swainson sang a good deal. We all voted it a most successful day.

Previous to this Sunday fortnight, I received a line from Mrs Shaw, saying she would be very glad to see me as she had come down with Nina and Gertrude. I went out and found my two little Malta chums, not much grown nor altered, excepting Nina is much more subdued and poor girl it did not take me long to find out the reason.

Since then rarely has a day passed without my being at their lodgings, assisting them to turn over to their new house, or spending the evening with them. I had them in to Down’s dance and brought them into tea here.

Gertrude sings very well, she has a most beautiful voice, her high notes being simply exquisite, but she requires a master to teach her how to bring her notes out, to manage her voice, and Nina, well I’ve grown to like that girl more and more, every day that I’ve seen her, to love her as a brother and to speak to her as one. Poor girl, her case is not a solitary one, loving a sailor Mr X and loved by him. The match is forbidden on both sides, and his father is very well off, and refuses to give him any money, or help him if he marries anyone without his consent. Colonel Shaw cannot help them and although he likes X very much, refuses to allow the match, – poor girl.

It made her very ill and although I can see she is full of him, she appears resigned, not saying much. I did feel for her, as she and her mother made me their confidant, and told the story. Myself, I hope it will still come right, when he comes home and sees his Father personally. She is such a nice girl, and there is much more in her than in Gertrude. She opened the conversation on Sunday to my surprise, on a very interesting subject – as we were going to church. I was going away after 5 o’c tea, as I did not care to stay and hear secular music sang, but she asked me to take her to church. I don’t care to jot down much more with regard to her.

Saturday last Tim Barrow and Lang Foote and Kennedy gave an afternoon dance at their lodgings, to which I went for an hour and then went on to the Shaws.

Yesterday afternoon, heard from dear old Father, who said Robbie had deserted with all his effects, and he was going in on Friday to pay the £30 – which Robbie knew he’d have to do. I sent him the £5 note I happened to have saved up for any emergency. Nothing happens by chance – I wonder where all these troubles will end. How I miss my Mother for I feel so desolate having to do the comforter to all around and feeling such a void in my own heart.

I do think Robbie is outrunning Russell by a long way in base ingratitude. My poor Father, already in debt, with the little children to bring up, all these continual calls being made upon him.

Am appointed to the Lord Warden – been busy turning my traps over.